Why You Should Leave Blog Comments Instead of Facebook Comments

I’m doing  (another) stint in Facebook Timeout. Every ban I’ve ever gotten has been for really stupid reason. “Harassment” was the official reason a few times. Harassment in these cases means I disagreed with someone’s opinion and they got mad. No exaggeration. I’ve been part of and seen respectful ,well constructed comments reported and resulting in a ban. Every single time, the commenter who was being disagreed with was stating opinions that would fall under the following categories : racism,homophobia,sexism, misogyny ,transphobia, body shaming, classism, religious intolerance….and of course, breastfeeding.Other things ,too, but those are the main things.  So, it’s ok to state racist and general assholey opinions of the book of face but if you disagree with those opinions, THAT is harassment. Got it? Yeah, me neither but that’s the way it seems to work.

I’ve been writing and participating in the blogosphere since 2002. WAY before Facebook. I liked it better then. For awhile ,Facebook did help bloggers establish farther reach to wider audiences but with the new “algorithms”, only 10% of a blog page’s audience sees their posts at all. Social media experts have spent the last few years explaining to bloggers that they NEED to have a presence on Facebook and I just don’t agree with that. Bloggers had readers without Facebook . It can be that way again.

The biggest change between blogging “back then” and now is how commenting has changed. This is the thing I miss the most. People used to leave comments ONLY on blogs! They didn’t just leave a comment on Facebook after seeing the title of a post and assuming they knew everything the post was about (sorry,that’s one of my biggest comment pet peeves. For crying out loud, people. READ the damn post before you comment! ).

Maybe it’s because I am incredibly disgruntled with Facebook at this exact second but I feel compelled to toss out the one huge reason that ya’ll, dear readers, should consider being a blog commenter instead of a Facebook commenter.

Molly Fair: Safe Space

 

THIS IS A SAFE SPACE

 

On Facebook, the lack of privacy means if you leave a comment on a page, all of the people you have friended on Facebook can see that comment. How many people you’ve friended on Facebook do you actually like or want to know your latest fight down at social services with your food stamp caseworker? The lack of privacy keeps people from commenting on pages in a conversation they could use support,advice or be the person to lend experience and support. On this blog, you don’t even have to use your real name to comment.

When I saw this is a safe space, I also mean that people are free to speak openly without fear of being attacked or judged for their experiences while dealing with class struggles and other issues that people in poverty have encountered. Everyone who has been marginalized by society is safe here. Comments that attack or demean anyone based on race,income,ability,sexuality,and gender are not tolerated. As the blog owner, I also have the added bonus of being able to block IP addresses and heavily moderate comments from people not interested in being part of an inclusive and supportive community.

I think of my blog as being an extension of my personal space. Like it’s my living room. When I am moderating comments, I think, “If this person were in my house, would I ask them to get out?” And would I ask them back again to give it another shot?
This might seem ridiculous to think I could craft such a place on the Internet but I believe that on any space I have devoted to curating the content with a spirit of hope & good intention, I have every right to make it so. I think I even feel that it’s my responsibility to my readers that I make this space as safe as I possibly can. My one bit of advice to people while using the Internet is ,”DON’T READ THE COMMENTS!”. The comment section of most places is a triggering cesspool of emotions. I want this blog to be the exception to that. Not only should it be ok to read the comments but it should be ok to leave a comment and not have to worry about unkind responses. It’s AWESOME to have thoughtful and engaging conversations about hot topic issues. Open dialogues are important. The best way to facilitate these kinds of conversations where everyone feels comfortable is to have guidelines that keep abusive attitudes out of the space entirely.

Unless one of the moderators on the Facebook page is vigilantly checking comments, it’s so impossible to ensure this sort of space can be a reality on Facebook. It just isn’t.

 

 

18 thoughts on “Why You Should Leave Blog Comments Instead of Facebook Comments

  1. Thank you for your sincere and thought provoking blog. Humble sent me your way a few months ago. I’ve sent a few friends your way and I know they love Poor As Folk as much as I do.

    Wishing you many blessings. Carol

  2. I agree with you whole-heartedly. Two issues resonate with my experiences. When I do, in a moment of idiocy, click on the comments, they become like a train-wreck I can’t look away from. Horrifying! As you said, there are always people who clearly didn’t read the piece, or can’t read for content because their remarks don’t compute. And there are those weasly trolls, the instigators of more inflamed emotion for no reason but to watch it happen.
    I’m following your blog because I am slowly working on a memoir-ish book titled Praying For Payday and Other Financial Follies I’ve Tried
    Your topics bring so much insight and resources that I can explore more in many directions to consider what to include, where to stop in my story, and how to write, not rant! A challenge some days. Thanks for a thought provoking and considerate place to read and speak.

    1. You are so very welcome.
      And that’s so awesome that you’re working on a book! I love book-writers ❤

      Some days, I definitely feel like I'm a Ranter, not a Writer.

  3. I really liked this! I agree with you that Facebook is frustrating. When I write a blog post, I share it with my Facebook page, and I reckon less than a quarter of my followers see each post. Now I totally get that not every follower of my blog wants to read every single one of my blog posts. What I don’t get is why Facebook thinks it can decide who sees what? Surely my readers can decide for themselves if they find something interesting or not? How on earth would Facebook know that this person likes this info, and that person would like that article much more?

    I think it is maybe easier to comment on Facebook, but we should encourage connections on blogs much more. I feel like conversations flow better on blog comments, don’t you agree?

    I get the impression that people are less and less impressed with Facebook. Who knows, maybe in a few more years it will one of those “used-to-be-cool” things…?

    1. I totally agree. With all of what you said but YES, conversations are more ….focused? Much better flow.

      This thing where they limit who see posts is SO STUPID. I have almost 10,000 fans on the page and maybe 300 might see it? Grrrr. I think you’re right. People seem kinda fed up w/ the book of face.

      1. There just seems to be more…space to chat, I think, on blogs. I feel like I can stretch out and get comfortable. Rather than have my words squished into “see more” or “click to see all comments”. Hardly the way to encourage dialogue!

        I have only 200 followers on my page, and sometimes only a handful of people actually see what I write. I would prefer if my followers chose themselves whether they thought what I wrote was worthy of reading or not!

  4. I normally lurk your facebook page, but wanted to comment here. I love your blog and find book-of-the-face horrible for real conversations. It’s more of a matter of who can type and click the fastest and anyone who does take the time to write something meaningful gets ignored because no one clicks the “read more”. I don’t get any of your pages in my feed anymore and have to either come here or go to your facebook page myself to see what’s new.

    1. I HATE the read more thing. I also have found on certain apps that it doesn’t show me all the comments, so I miss some things (and I think other people might be missing things that others said ). There are A LOT of pages I like on FB that I never ,ever see anymore. I even did that thing they recommended where you mark that you want it to appear in your newsfeed. Doesn’t work.

      And thank you for de-lurking to comment! 😀

  5. I have to completely agree. As a fellow blogger the lack of comments is disheartening to me and pushes me toward facebook more. I think that if I took your approach I would feel better about posting. Thanks for the awesome read!

  6. I was directed here by a share from one of my favorite blogger’s FB page (Joni Rae at Tales of a Kitchen Witch). I’m a small time blogger, but felt pressured to move to Facebook mostly after I took a year off from blogging and was getting no views. So glad I followed her link, because I agree with you. I feel like I spend more time working on my Facebook page than my actual blog, mostly because of the viewership issues with the way Facebook works. Thanks for the post – it was cathartic to read.

    1. Aw,yay…. I love Joni! Thanks for reading and commenting 🙂

      Something clicked a couple weeks ago when I was feeling frustrated by the view situation on FB. I’m a writer and blogger, not a Facebooker! I shouldn’t be wasting my time with all that nonsense

  7. This posts hits the nail on the head! I was starting to take it personally when my pictures on FB were getting tons of views (and comments) and my blog posts were getting approximately zero! Honestly, my ego and blogger confidence was taking a beating. I’m still a newbie and I jones for feedback, ya know? Luckily, I am able to see all of your posts and will happily comment here moving forward.

    And, I think you rock. That is all. 🙂

    1. Thank you 🙂 You rock,too!
      I know EXACTLY what you mean! I’d have some picture on FB get viral worthy shares and not be nearly as excited if I got just one comment and like here LOL

  8. Honestly I think its just us readers being lazy. Its just so easy to comment on Facebook. You don’t have to fill out any extra fields or verify an email address . Sometimes I don’t want to even click on a link! I’d rather it just be THERE. So for people who are sad about no comments on blogs, don’t be! We’re just lazy!

  9. Facebook is definitely becoming a pit. I’m still there, mainly because of family, andy stitchy buddies… But I see the keyboard warrior bullshit a lot (even in a city watch group, someone went off about a post & went on an abusive tirade against people with disabilities thinking they are better than others… I shit you not!).

    Your blog rocks so much that I WILL make a better effort to comment here!

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